Drunkards Cloak

Then...

And Now...

Obama, I'll Do You One Better Than Your Planned Social Reforms...

(which will probably never come into fruition).   A trained monkey could do PR, so why not give a homeless guy a shot? 

Name: Bill-Bow-Baggins
Address: 4th Park Bench (on the left) from the St. Marks and Ave A entrance of Thompkins Square Park
Phone: The pay phone on Eldridge and Houston

Objective: If Fiddy can make it, why oh why can't I?

Education
School: of Hard Knocks
Major: League Baseball... I remember back in the day when me and The Great Bambino used to be best friends.  I used to know lots of famous people before I became homeless.  Once I had tea with Queen Elizabeth.  Then I got HIV.

Experience:
None, but I read the tabloids everyday, then steal them for bedding.

Budget Entertainment

First an explanation of what's going on here: homeless man outside bar window, blowing up balloons using the carbonation from a soda bottle, in the rain.

Because people's discretionary income is down like the economy; why spend money on Broadway's live entertainment when you can be delighted by the shenanigans of a man that lives under a park bench?  For the grand finale?  He should consider throwing some mentos in that soda bottle and spraying his adoring onlookers... SeaWorld is now obsolete.

Derelict Series

A tribute to NYC's homeless population.

Exciting Siting... Bare Foot: The Story of a Foot Pas

While smoking a cig at the Empire Hotel I saw these two and watched as our barefoot belligerent beast desperately tried to pick up this innocent bystander.

This is what ran through mind...
 "Where are your friends?   Someone needs to put an end to this.  I wonder when she is going to pull out a slice of pizza from her purse and start beasting on the ground.  He's stopped responding why are you still talking to yourself.  Have you ever heard of flats? I wish my phone had video and not just a camera.  OMG do I act like this when I'm drunk?"

I'm Too Sexy For My Leg Warmers (Especially During the Summer)

You know you're trying too hard when your wearing leather pants and leg warmers on the hottest day of the year... 104 fucking degrees... I don't sweat that.

Nude Fix(ie): Natural American Spirits

Saw these three while running over the Williamsburg Bridge; because hipsters are running out of "original"/"ironic" things to do and wear I guess clothing all together is now optional... at least their sticking to their Williamsburg roots... not riding their fixie bikes, but walking them along as the summers must have hipster accessory.


A song about hipsters...
Accidental Hipster

100% Mail?

I remember this boy in my high school that used to sit in the halls and make his own chain mail, it wasn't cool then, and its still not cool today... this dude looks like he's trying to be a kinky gay version of Heath Ledger in A Knights Tale.

There is no reason a garment should be constructed of 87% steal and 13% leather.  Yah, the cotton crisis is bad... but its not that bad.

Two Much

Twins are a common fetish for most males, but in this case one of them is too ludicrous to handle.

Desperately Wanting To Live in Sci-Fi... Mystique JR

Newest trend to stand out from the crowd: your skin tone(s?) should match your fashion choices.

Anyone can excessively match (think coordinated fitted, t-shirt, AND kicks), but living in manhattan where superfluity is crucial to all aspects of life, simply matching your outfit is no longer adequate.

Rainbow Bright

There should come a time in everyone's life where they say to themselves "Fuck, I'm getting too old for this shit"... This ladies moment was about 35 years ago.

Another One Channeling Tim Burton

Last I figured Tim Burton had become predictable and played out... Try something new man.  Did we miss the memo?  When did this aesthetic become cool again?  It's no longer the 90's.

Check out this on-point YouTube video making fun of Tim Burton's estimable past and future projects.

Tim Burton's Secret Formula 

Life Imitating Art: Picasso vs. Tim Butron

I found these two deep in conversation in the back of a bar.

Right Side: Creepy Colourful Creatures

To the Left: Ghoulish Gout Goths

Theme of the week... GOTHIC

The next series of posts are gothic inspired.  Everyday I will be posting a new picture from my "you need to see the light of day" files

Can You Hear Me Now?... How about Now?... Now?

Outside the Fashion Institute of Technology I saw this man talking to himself on this dismembered phone.  And yes, he was so deep in conversation he didn't even notice me taking pics.

Jesus?

This one was taken by my friend John in Long Island.

Note to girls, when you try to copy Mary Kate Olsen's look, more often than not your just going to end up looking crazy and/or homeless.

Another One For the ASSB

ASSB Anti Socks with Sandals Brigade

With this monochromatic look was this guy trying to go for the illusion of wearing a real shoe?... if so major fail

Rolling with the Homies

"Rolling with the Homies" - Name that quote.

A time machine back into the 90's:

Fake Bleached Hair, CHECK
Baby T, CHECK
Short Shorts, CHECK
Old School Plastic Rollerblades, CHECK
I'm ready for the Roller Disco!

Dead, or Just Resting? Either Way, NAGL

NAGL, Not A Good Look

The crusty kids of the East Village have infiltrated Manhattan.  They're movin' on up, to the Upper West Side and infesting a park near you!

This sample has forgone the stereotypical Crusty Khaki ensemble and upgraded to an all denim Cowboy Tuxedo.   This is probably in efforts to try and chameleon into his new socioeconimical and geographical surroundings.

WWD Indeed - "What Were (you) Doing?"

Propaganda at it's finest, a highly regarded fashion resource trying to make the public think the uncool is now cool.

Socks with sandals, really?  We don't need to say anything else about this, the front page speaks for itself.


A letter sent to WWD from an appalled reader (aka Tracy)...



Dear WWD,


Check please! Indeed? Please cancel my check from my recent subscription to WWD...as president of the Anti-Socks with Sandals Brigade or ASSB I find your front page picture on Thursday, June 23rds edition EXTREMELY offensive and appalling. This is incredibly damaging to my psyche and I am frankly embarrassed to holding a subscription.

Unfortunately I chose to look at it over lunch and was forced to throw out the remainder of my vegetarian duck pad thai from nausea.

Perhaps the Mayan Calendar is correct, the world must be coming to an end.

--
Sincerely,

Tracy Torhan

Poodle Skirt Upgrade

I saw this gem while shopping in SoHo.

"It's totally safe, we use vegetable dye, he loves it!" - in response to my dye process query

...and this is a side by side comparison of my sister and our dog in the same poodle skirt... circa 1995

Intimidating Tartan

This is too much plaid for one man to pull off...

Avitar Everyday?

Because LARPing (Live Action Role Playing) and Halloween weren't enough, why not fashion your look after a blue fictional character on the daily?

Welcome...

Tracy and I will post pictures of the ridiculous people that we see around Manhattan, you know the ones that are clearly trying too hard to look cool.

This goes out to the people that wear socks with Tevas, boots in 100 degree weather,  the men that really need to eat a cheeseburger and the girls that walk around in the middle of the day wearing 6 inch heals and too much lycra.

This blog is dedicated to the extremist things people do and wear in Manhattan in order to get attention and try to stand out.

If you see someone that looks like they styled their outfit after a forever 21 mannequin or just looks like they are trying too hard to be trendy, snap a pic and send it to us.

YourTryingTooHard@gmail.com